The Albatross

I’m immersed in a project now that is the bane of my professional existence.  It has me so downtrodden I have little interest in working on it and therefore procrastinate because I detest it so.

It’s not that documenting processes for a new system is all that terrible, but it can be horrifically boring and repetitive and leave little room for creativity.  

That’s where my blogging comes in.

Well…it used too.

I’m not posting much and honestly have very little enthusiasm to try. I still voraciously read and check in with everyone else, but hitting the keys at my own digs takes too much effort.

I think it all stems from this horrible assignment.

I have corporate pulling my arms, telling me how this system works, how it should work and who has authority to do what and when. “We need checks and balances.  We need to control authorization!”

I have the end users pulling my feet.  “Corporate has no business in our affairs.  They don’t use the system and shouldn’t have any say in its day to day operation.”

I didn’t mind when they got attitudes with each other, because I am the neutral party.

At least I was.

I’m now on the receiving end of the attitudes and I gotta tell you…I don’t care for it much. 

Why are you checking in with so and so?

Uh, she’s the project manager.

She doesn’t use this system, you need to be checking in with us.

I’ll certainly be happy to show you anything I have and as a matter of fact I do need your input.

You need to let us review it not her!

Nobody has decided where the processes are going to be housed and who has control over them once they are finished.  Who is going to do ongoing maintenance?  

Just tell me who in God’s name is in charge! 

I’m going to piss somebody off and I hate that.  Yet it isn’t me making the decisions. 

…and I don’t know who is...making the decisions.

This ain’t my first rodeo, kids.  I’ve done this sort of thing before and I hate the personal and emotional toll this project is taking on me.  Usually I’m above it all, but I’m a hair’s breath away from extricating myself from this whole ugly mess, giving them what I have so far and telling them to go to a hot place.

Am I just burned out?

So here I sit.

...or should I say lie?

… on the proverbial rack.