Verbal Diarrhea

Have you ever said anything really awkward and/or inappropriate and the minute it comes out of your mouth wished you could take it back?

Have you admitted or revealed much-too-personal things to someone and later wonder why in the name of all that’s holy can’t you just keep your big yap shut?

Lawsie.

I mentally bang my forehead with my hand and think, “Stupid, stupid, stupid!”

Then I stew on it for awhile, replaying the event over and over in my mind obsessing- wondering if anyone noticed. Did I offend anyone? Do they think I’m an idiot? Am I a social moron? Do they think I’m a bad person? What should I have done differently? Do these jeans make my ass look big?

Eventually I get over it. Or at least I think I do. Years later I’ll be nodding off to sleep and a fleeting thought of that moment goes through my head and it’s as if it just happened. What causes thoughts like this to just pop into my head out of goofin’ nowhere?

Shouldn’t a normal, well-adjusted person just get the heck over it?

This whole idea came to mind as I was sitting on the pot, staring at the wall and suddenly remembered a particularly embarrassing event that took place, oh let’s see…

12 Years ago!

Do you ever write posts while sitting on the commode-either physically or just in your head?

No?

Oh.

(Banging Forehead)

“…Stupid, stupid, stupid!”