Thursday, March 13, 2008

Rah! Rah! Sis-Boom-Bah!

Big Daddy and I went grocery shopping.

Big Fun!

We rounded the corner and at the end of the laundry soap aisle we saw a man wearing a floor-length raccoon fur coat.

My hand to God.

It’s one of those things you see that you’re not really sure you saw. Big Daddy and I stole a glance at each other out of the corner of our eyes just to make sure that we were indeed seeing the same thing.

We were.

We waited until we passed him and then doubled over with laughter. It was the most ridiculous thing we’d ever seen. BD said, “All he needs is a banner and a megaphone.” He was right! Except for being several years too old to be a traditional student, this guy looked like he’d rolled straight out of 1920’s college football stadium.

Now, granted, there was snow on the ground and it was a tad nippy, but a floor length fur coat?

He wasn’t making a ‘mountain man’ statement either. His hair and beard were trimmed nicely, he wore conservative clothing and there wasn't any chaw nor a possibles bag in sight. I think that’s why his coat looked so danged odd.

We had to detour around the store to make sure we didn’t run into him again. It was too dangerous-who knows where all that uncontrolled laughter could lead? We didn't want it to lead to a fist fight out by the bike rack.

We didn't pass by him again, but we knew when anyone else had.

In the soda aisle we heard, “Did you see that?” and passing through the produce was “Where would you get something like that?”

Wal-Mart was a cheerful place that evening-full of laughing people.

I don’t think the man noticed. He seemed oblivious to any comment and not the least bit self-conscious.


No beard on this one, but it's as close as I could find.


Erica said...

Mother of God. We have a woman in my neighborhood who's about eighty-something years old, must have had about a dozen or so (perhaps more) facelifts, wears this big boofy brassy blond wig, has super collagen-injected lips that are like a hybrid of Steven Tyler's and Angelina Jolie's, and walks around oblivious to the world around her in very skimpy gold lame (the stuff that's pronounced "la-may," but I can't make it do the accent to make it not look like "lame.") Daisy Dukes. She stops me in my tracks every single time. We also have a low-budget Elvis impersonator, who I don't think intentionally tries to look like The King, but does anyways.

Sugar Britches said...

I love to see characters like that. People watching is a fantastic past time. Wait a minute, though. Are they watching me, too?

Anonymous said...

... I once was unloading furniture from a truck in Edinburgh (helping my BIL move) and saw a handsome fellow with a beard sporting a beautiful red cocktail dress and open-toed high heels...... I couldn't help but watch - dumbfounded.... as he passed me, he said "free country, eh, buddy?"....

... all I could muster at the time was "fuckin-A, man.... OBVIOUSLY!".....

... no kidding....


Sugar Britches said...

Eric-My run in with a cross dresser is fodder for a post all by itself. I should work on that.