Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Snack Cakes

I left a unit of blood behind today.

Actually, Boon and I both did. We ran out to the parking lot about 10 this morning and let the good people of the Community Blood Center do quick work with their needles and bags.

It is frickin’ freezing on that blood van-every time. I swear to God you could hang meat in that thing. 

Maybe that’s their evil plan?

After every donation, they make you sit a spell and replenish your fluids and have a little snack.

It’s the only time I can allow Little Debbie to pass my lips without feeling guilty. (Little Debbies are snack cakes, Y’all. Get yon mind outta the gutter.)

But today I wanted salty. I devoured a small bag of Gardetto’s and sipped me a little diet Coke. I did however, take a Ding Dong to go.

I used to like Ding Dongs, but I loved Ho Hos. The blood van never has the latter, so I make due with the former.

Back at my desk, Boon saw my Ding Dong sitting innocently on my desk.

You know Sugar, walking by your desk I have the strange urge to do this!

She made a fist and motioned like she was going to smash my snack cake.

I was appalled.

By God, Woman! You leave my Ho Ho alone!

It’s not a Ho Ho, it’s a Ding Dong.

You’re a ding dong!

No you are!

You see where this is going? Two women of age fighting over the demise of a chocolate, frosting filled treat? 

So we stopped short of fisticuffs and wondered where in the world the odd names came from. If you care, you can find that information here and here.

Of course we had to look it up. Are you daft? This is important information. We don’t know squat about what’s going on in Georgia, but by God we will find out the history of our snack cakes. 

This is America!

As we were researching, Boon again made mention of my snack cake-this time shouting excitedly how we could cross the two.

I know! We could make a Ding Ho.

No, no, no. Ho Dongs! We’ll find a way to make giant Ho Dongs.

I know.

…sounds nasty doesn’t it?

Ding Dong and Ho Ho are such cute friendly words. They conjure up lunch boxes and play clothes. So how could a combination of the two sound so horribly wrong?

I mean I guess I could live with a Ding Ho, but Ho Dong?

Unless you’re a Chinese gymnast it just sounds plain naughty.


MoxieMamaKC said...

This post rocked. Full of humor and history. Too bad you didn't think of this last year. Ho Dongs could have been the Official Snack Cake of the Beijing Olympics...all the best ideas come too late...

Sugar Britches said...

A day late and a dollar short.

My other cohort at work came in today telling me that what I was eating yesterday wasn't a Ding Dong, but was in fact a Cupcake. She was at he store last night and had a hankering for a Ding Dong. mmmm. As she was looking, she noticed that Ding Dongs don't have the little squiggly of frosting on top...only cupcakes do. Go figure.

I'm so ashamed!