Whatta Guy

RING!

This is Sugar, how can I help you?

Mother!

Ohgodwhatswrong?

Well...

Just tell me.  It's OK. Whatever it is, it'll be fine.

Alright...The cable is out. The internet is out.  Everything!

That's it?

Are you kidding?  This is a tragedy of epic proportion.

Jesus Christ on a stick!  I'm at work. What do you want me to do about it? 

Call the cable company.  

You call the cable company.  

No you.

You're there. I'm not.  If you call, you can tell them how it's behaving.

But you know how to handle those people.

Why don't you take this opportunity to, I don't know, do some homework?  MMM?

Well right now I'm not doing homework but I am working.

Don't lie to my, Boy.  You are not.

I am too.  I'm sitting in the kitchen in my drawers sewing up a split in the side of my shorts. It's not pretty, but it's functional.

To conclude:  Big won't call the cable company.  However...

Big mends his own clothes. 

I don't care you are.  That's awesome!